Samantha Brick - Hell's Angel

I am sure many of you who have found yourself looking at this blog entry are here because you have typed the words "Samantha" or "Brick" (or, most likely, both) into a search engine.

Now, usually, typing in the word "brick" would direct you to a picture or description of that wonderful little item that is used to build houses, but as of yesterday, the word "Brick" would actually send you in the direction of a couple of articles written by the now infamous journalist; Samantha Brick.

As you are all aware, there has been a backlash of hatred thrown at Ms Brick for the article that was printed in the Daily Mail yesterday: "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!"

With a title like that, surely she knew that people across the country, and also the world, would not be thrilled by what they were going to read!?

After reading the article myself, I found myself feeling so irritated by Samantha Brick's statements.  Not necessarily the way she was loving herself far too much, but because of her insulting view of other women.  She kept banging on about how women HATE her because she is "beautiful".

Well, that sent my blood bubbling.  I know so many women who are naturally beautiful but I have never ever disliked them for it; and, I have never met any woman who has HATED another woman because they are beautiful.  It's absurd!  And it is this view, more than anything, which makes me think that Samantha Brick is exceptionally deluded, not because she considers herself as being so painfully attractive that men fall at her feet whenever she leaves the house.

It is not just insulting to women though, it is also insulting to men!  Now, yes us women do jest about how men have no self-control when it comes to beautiful women, but not all men are like that!!

She seems to be under the impression that every man on the planet will fall in love with her as soon as he claps eyes on her.  Now, this may be the case in some situations as her "pleasing appearance and pretty smile" may have rendered men weak at the knees.  However, I don't believe for one second that women dislike her because of her looks and I think Mrs Brickface needs to consider the notion that in actual fact it might be her personality that people HATE.

Did any of your read the follow up article Old Bricky published today?  Well, that certainly made for some entertaining reading.  She banged on about how she felt so upset about the hate mail she was receiving online, but that didn't stop her from reiterating just how beautiful she is and how she could easily steal someone's man from them in a second.

My favourite anecdote of today's article was when she said that a man saw her in her car yesterday, close to tears because of all the hate mail, and he offered to buy her a coffee.  Most people would have considered this just a kind gesture of good will...but not the Brickster!  Oh no, she said "He could see I was having a tough time — and yes, my looks had helped me out again."

WHAT??  What has that got to do with her looks?  The guy was being a gent and making sure she was OK.  I can deal with Old Bricky loving herself, but it is these self-absorbed comments that are the real reason she has never been a bridesmaid for a friend!

Arghhhhh!!!

So, I have expressed my opinion on Bricky Brickerson, and after having a quick glance at other articles she has written it has dawned on me what is really going through her head...she is suffering some psychological issues.  I say this because there is an article that she wrote about a year ago about how she suffered obesity as a child and is now obsessed with being beautiful - so much so that this has encouraged the belief that she is the most beautiful woman in the world.  Hence the arrogance and self-obsession.  I think that she believes that if she doesn't consider herself as being beautiful, no one else will.

All together now: "Awwwww!" ..... OK, maybe not!

Old Bricky also wrote an article about how she spent £25,000 on psychics!  Well, I suggest she gets her money back as it doesn't seem she was ever warned about this little blip in her life...

Samantha Brick, if your peepers ever fall upon this blog entry, may I suggest to you that in the future, when these helpless men throw their money at you, you thank them for their generosity but tell them to give that money to charity instead?! 

Your beauty may be able to help other unfortunate people after all!

Playing It Straight - The Result

***Spoilers Alert***

So, the final of Playing It Straight has arrived...and everyone was curious to know whether or not Cara picked the straight man as the winner, leaving both able to walk away with £25k.

So, did she do it??

First of all, Cara and the boys received the dreaded visit from Jameela, who informed Cara that "at least" one of the boys left was straight...and "at least" one of the boys was gay.  This, of course, did not make things any easier for poor Cara.

Then, we saw Cara have to pick one of the last remaining four boys to leave the Hacienda.  It was a cruel twist in the form of four envelopes that each invited the boys on a date with Cara...except envelope number 4, which saw the chosen boy get sent back home to England.  That boy was....

Danny.  "But before you go, I have to know...are you gay or are you straight?" - He was gay.  Cheeky!  But, out of the last four, he was definitely the gayest.

Cara was not happy.

So, after the dates, Cara still felt none the wiser.  Out of Sam, Sven and Dean, she had to send someone home before picking the winner out of the final two.

Sam was invited up onto the step...Cara sent him packing.  That's when she found out whether or not she made the right decision...and she had done!!  Sam, just like his twin brother, was gay.  After this revelation, he was told to "just go!" and off he went.

Again, Cara was not happy...

So, two boys left.  Sven - the most boisterous out of everyone in the group, and deemed "too straight to be straight", and Dean - who had developed a bromance with - previously outed - Danny.

And the winner is...

Dean!  Cara chose Dean as the straight man.  And what did he turn out to be?

Straight!!  They won!  Well, this had to be the first time anyone saw Cara crack a smile since the competition began.  But being £25k richer would certainly put a smile on anyone's face.  There was much picking up and swinging around done while both Dean and Cara cheered.

As for Sven...who was stood there waiting to confess whether or not he was gay or straight and confirm whether Cara would have still won, or lost if she had picked him...he made his way to the top of the steps and looked Cara in those beadies of hers.

He offered the same suspense that Cara did each week while he waited to hear if he would be staying/leaving the Hacienda.

And what was he?

Gay!!!  Yes - that boisterous little beast turned out to be gay!  What a player.  Luckily for him (and his marbles) though, Cara was too happy with her recent win to really care anymore.

Out of the remaining four boys, Cara picked the only one that was straight as the winner!

Very good - well done!  Now roll on the next series...

Playing It Straight - The Name of the Game

Did you ever see the previous season of this show? June Sarpong was the hostess and the girl in Cara's position ended up choosing a gay man. She was furious with him - saying he had lied and conned her all this time. Which, yes, I agree is true, but that's the name of the game!! It's called PLAYING IT STRAIGHT! That's what he was there to do.

June was just as horrid to the guy too when it came out that he had...come out. (Teeheehee - a little pun there for you) She was giving him dirty looks, shaking her head, didn't speak to him.  She went right down in my estimation after that. Surely she should be impartial!?

Anyway, my point about this last part is that Cara, from the current series (see previous blog) seems to be going the same way. She clearly does not have any emotional attachment to the remaining boys (or any of the previous ones) so she is clearly in it for the money now. However, she keeps telling the boys that she will be really angry if they turn out to be gay. In other words, she'll be bitter that they played a better game than she did and she doesn't want to go home empty handed. Greed!

Jameela Jamil (the hostess of this year's show) should not react like June did...I'll be very disappointed if she does, and expect to see a blog expressing that...!

Playing It Straight

***Spoilers Alert***

Have you seen this programme?  It's hilarious!

Cara, the girl searching for her perfect partner...and £25k...is trying to seek the straight men within a mixed bag of straight and gay men.

I should mention at this point that if Cara picks a straight man in the final showdown to share the £50k pot with, they share the money ( £25k each for anyone not feeling mathematical today).  HOWEVER, if she chooses a gay man at the end, he walks away with the whole pot!  That's right, he gets twice as much for fooling her, and she walks away with nothing!

She started off doing quite well and sent a few gay men packing from the Hacienda where they are all staying.  Now, she seems to be firing directly at the straight men...you can't blame her though; most of them are very camp.

Each week (although I imagine it's days in reality) we see Cara sending the boys on a variety of tasks where they have to prove their heterosexuality!  This is where it gets tricky though.  Some of the gay men are so buff and manly that they conceal their homosexuality very well.

I love that though, as it proves that people should not stereotype.  I've been on Cara's side many a time believing that the person she has sent home is gay and he is straight, and vice versa.

Anyway, so at the moment we are left with four men: Sam, Danny, Dean and Sven.

It's so hard to call!  But here is what I think:

Sam: Gay/Straight - Hard to tell as his twin brother, Ben, who was eliminated last night, was gay and I'm unsure of whether or not both twins are gay.  According to my friend, it's common for both twins to be gay.  So, that's why I'm undecided on Sam.

Danny: Gay - I would be surprised if he is straight.  He's the only one out of the four that I'm adamant about their sexuality.

Dean: Straight - Part of me does want to say gay...and I'm very tempted to change my prediction...but I think he does genuinely care about Cara, so I don't think he would want to hurt her.  I'd be surprised if he has been conning her all along.

Sven: Straight - As it stands, and possibly has done for a while, he is the straightest man in the Hacienda.  He is so boisterous and pig-headed that I'd be shocked if he is gay.  However, he has said many a time to Cara that he doesn't fancy her and he is solely there for the money.  Is £25k enough or is he double-bluffing and going for the £50k??  It's very hard to tell.

Now, even if you don't really care about the competition, you should definitely just watch this programme for the narration of Alan Carr.  Oh my Goodness, he is absolutely hilarious!!!  I have actually been laughing out loud (lolling!) from his comments about the boys.  Comedy Gold.

Come And Praise

Does anyone else remember the 'Come and Praise' books at primary school??

Oh, how much fun we used to have singing the hymns from the books.  There are only a few that I can think of from the top of my head, and I'm not too familiar with the titles either...but who else remembers the following:

1. Dance, dance, wherever you may be.  I am the Lord of the Dance said he, and I'll lead you all, wherever you may be, and I'll lead you all in the dance, said he.  I believe this was called "Lord of the Dance" but I could be wrong...Nowadays, I just associate it with Michael Flatley!?

2. Oh I mustn't forget!  No I mustn't forget...to say a great big thank you, no I mustn't forget.  No idea what this bad boy was called - but what a song!  This was my brother's favourite.

3. He's got the whole world in his hands, he's got the whole world in his hands... That could go on for a while, but you get the jist!

4. Now, I don't remember the rest of this next song, only the beginning.  Nowadays, when I sing it, I seem to go into a different song halfway through...you'll see what I mean: If I had a hammer, I'd hammer in the morning, I'd hammer in the evening, all over this land...but you've gotta have money, a whole lotta spending money, you've gotta have patience and money, to do it right, child.  Close, but no ciggy!

Right, that's all I can remember of the hymns.  The only other thing I remember is the book itself.  It was a blue book with a bunch of creepy looking kids on the front.  They did not look like they wanted to come and praise with us at all... no, they actually looked as if they wanted to kill us instead.

I've attached a picture, which I found on Google, for you to see what I mean...

Do you remember 'Come and Praise' from your Primary School days?  If so, I'd love to know your experiences and what hymns you remember...!

I would also like to know your thoughts on the yobbos from the book...?

Him & Her

If you have not seen this BBC3 comedy yet, I advise you to do so.  It's a delight!

Basically, Steve and Becky (aka Him & Her) live like slobs in a dingy little flat that looks as if it has never been cleaned.  However, they very much love each other and that's all that matters.  Russell Tovey and Sarah Solemani are perfect as the benefit-claiming couple as they bounce off each other so naturally.

The comedy is amped up with the assistance from Dan (the socially awkward neighbour from upstairs), Laura (Becky's romanticist sister) and Paul (Laura's fiance/hot-headed adulterer).

This is one of those shows that you can watch over and over again and still find something new to laugh at.  It's brilliant to see another show use such a small space in a number of ways.  It's a very clever thing to do and can only be achieved by the most observant comedy writers (think Craig Cash and Caroline Aherne with The Royle Family).

If there is one thing I ask of you, it's to watch this programme!  It's a realistic view of romance in the modern world, and you will find yourself pointing at certain character traits and comparing them to your own.

Truly wonderful!

Alan Partridge

Is it just me or does anyone else say at least one Alan Partridge quote each day without realising?

Any favourite quotes?


- Loulabella posting from her iPhone

Silas Blissett

I had to blog about this as I found it very funny and it certainly brightened up my day...

I tweeted a message today that read "As much as I love Psycho Silas I do wish they would tie up the storyline now!"

Next thing I know, I have a reply from none other than Silas Blissett himself!!! It read: "Love you too"

Of course, if I were in the Hollyoaks village I would indeed consider it to be quite horrifying!

However, as I am not, it was a very comedic surprise to see such a response to my tweet.


- Loulabella posting from her iPhone

Fred Figglehorn

My brother introduced me to the world of Fred Figglehorn on YouTube.

Fred is a character created by Lucas Cruikshank and has a very high-pitched voice.  He gets to all kinds of comedic scrapes and has produced a couple of songs.

Fred is either loved or hated - personally, I think he is a hoot - due to his child-like ways.

To ease you into his world, I'm going to provide links to two of his songs.  Enjoy...

The Babysitter's a Vampire

Christmas is Creepy

Twitter Twits

As the old advice goes, you should never meet your heroes as you will be disappointed.

Well, I'm wondering if this actually applies to today's society...

I am now following several comedians/comediennes on Twitter and must say...I'm very disappointed!

They're just not funny!!

I know, I know, they can't be funny all the time, but babbling on about every day, mediocre things just proves that Twitter is an excuse for celebrities - and I use the term very loosely - to express just how pretentious their founded fame has made them!

Now, if you don't mind, I have some very important blogging to do regarding a dilemma I encountered today involving vegetable and minestrone soup...



P.s. One comedian who has proven to be extremely delightful to follow is Laurence Rickard @Lazbotron (one of the actors from Horrible Histories who was recommended by a friend)


- Loulabella posting from her iPhone

The Inbetweeners Movie - Review

*** Spoilers Alert ***

Hurrah!  The film we have all been waiting for, and anticipating, for so long is finally here!

Yes, there was much scepticism that a film would not match up to the classically cringe-worthy show about four teenagers who are very uncool, but incredibly hilarious.

So, was it any good?  (I hear you cry!)

Yes.  In my opinion, it was.  It just seemed like an extended episode from the series; which I suppose it was really.  And where better to set the scene than on a lads' holiday in Malia (or Magaluf, apparently, as most of it was filmed there...)

So, it started with that awfully moody 'mare, Carli, breaking up with Simon (so they did get together at the end of series 3 then) as she considered the distance for them while they are uni would be a problem...and she was going on a girls' holiday...  Slut!

Of course, the lads then come up with the plan to go on their own holiday.  God knows why!  Surely they realise by now that they are each a liability to themselves, let alone the rest of the world.

However, it happens, so off they go.

Now, you may think that Neil's body-popping dancing, Jay's vulgar names for lady parts, Simon's stalker streak, and Will's...well just being Will...would be a bit much for a one hour and fifteen minute film (yes, short, I know!), but it's not. They are all accentuated brilliantly!

As a girl, I did not like the gross-out moments, such as when someone is vomiting, there is a pooh in the bidet, and a character gets Jay's pooh on his nose (even if he did deserve it).

But, the good parts outweighed those moments; such as Jay being bullied by a young boy and then throwing him in the pool, the comedic group dancing, Simon swimming to the shore from the party boat, but drowning halfway there and having to be air-lifted out of the water, and of course all of the boys finding love...sort of...

Yes, these are just to name a few of the genius moments that occur in the film that was worth the wait.

Loula's Verdict: Recommended!  Go see it!  Brilliant!

Horrible Histories

For most over the age of twenty, you will be forgiven for believing that I am referring to the wonderfully graphic books that offered much literary entertainment during your youth.

In a sense, yes I am referring to the Horrible Histories series of books.

However, I am particularly referring to the new, up-to-date, magnificent television series that is an adaptation from the books.

It is shown on CBBC (don't let that put you off) and is truly marvellous and clever.  I urge you to give this show a whirl as I think most of you will find it very appealing.

The actors involved are tremendous in delivering a history lesson that is fun, funny, and...fundamental for a pub quiz(?)!  (What better way to remember historical events than with a sketch or a song?)

Ah, talking about the songs...

These are primarily the best factor of the show.  It is difficult for me to express just how fantastic they truly are, so I have offered some links to a few YouTube videos which should convince you much more than I possibly can:

 Dick Turpin - Highway Man

Vikings (Literally)

King Richard III

As an added bonus, the guy who plays Dick Turpin is incredibly hot, and becomes more so the more you watch him...

Enjoy!

If Facebook had rules...

As many of you know, Facebook does not have a rule book. However, if it did, here are the top ten:

#1 People are not allowed to 'like' their own statuses. Never. No exceptions.

#2 People can give the following reasons as to why they do not want to accept someone's friend request:
A. I don't care if you are related to my boyfriend's mom's friend's son's girlfriend... I still don't know you;
B. You are an ex, the only reason I would accept you as a friend is so I can flaunt my new relationship and my successes for your benefit, but I'm above all that so I'll avoid the opportunity;
C. You're my ex's girlfriend, it would just be awkward;
D. You're my boyfriend's ex. It would just be weird;
E. I already have a huge list of "friends" that I don't talk to, you'll only make it longer;
F. You're a bitch.

#3 Any attention seeking pessimists who talk daily about their woeful lives through their statuses will receive an immediate lifetime ban. Their half empty glass should not be the world's problem.

#4 "Some people really need to get a life" - If this comment, or something similar, is used then the person being talked about must be named. It saves the hassle of the curious having to work for the information.

#5 If the above status is questioned by a sympathetic 'friend', and is then answered with "Inbox me", the person shall be banned. They will gain more of that desired attention if they follow through with airing their dirty laundry publicly.

#6 "Fake" marriages and engagements result in an instant ban. People should not waste a 'congratulations' on something that isn't real.

#7 'Re-post' statuses are unacceptable. "Please put this as your status if you have a best friend and have been affected by mosquitoes".

#8 Parents are limited to four statuses a day regarding their babies. People are happy for them but hearing about their sleeping pattern each day gets a little tedious.

#9 A dislike button.

#10 Parents (particularly those above the age of 50) are banned. It's social suicide for them and their kids!

Walt Disney - The Dirty Devil

I'm sure many of you have heard about this before: Walt Disney was quite a naughty boy when it came to fiddling with the hidden messages included within his movies.

Now, whether this is true or not is certainly up for discussion, but my opinion is that he knew what was going on and chose to turn a blind eye.

Don't get me wrong, I think some things went missing under the radar but many were left for the Disney staff's personal entertainment.

It was risqué and, of course, a little bit funny.

"Funny?" I hear some of you cry, because obviously these films are primarily considered to be kids' films.

Do I change it? No. Why? Because even though they are kids' films, I have to ask... Did you notice any of the naughty things that Walt & Co put into their movies when you were a kid? No.

I can guarantee that the majority of you didn't even notice the innuendoes when you were an adult either and you're only aware of it as a result of the wonderful world of the Internet.

Many times I watched The Rescuers as a child and not once did I notice the topless lady in the background of one of the scenes. (She is in a window when Bernard and Bianca are flying downwards past the buildings in their sardine can) Only when I came across it on the internet did I know it was there and looked for it.

There are many more like this too, and it's something that is still happening with Disney films of modern times, keeping Walt's kinky sense of humour alive. The most recent was on the picture of Tangled. The hair of the girl is wrapped around the boy, and the tangle spells out 'SEX'.

Naughty stuff!

But again, unless you're looking for it, you wouldn't even know it was there.

It could be mere coincidence and is something that is recognised/conjured up by very perceptive teenage boys whose hormones are going crazy and are obsessed with sex. C'mon, it's natural! And therefore highly entertaining for us who would rather believe that the innuendo IS there, rather than not.

Other naughty 'mistakes' are listed below, with my opinion as to whether or not it was intentional:

• The dust on the cliff in The Lion King blows off when Simba lies down and spells out 'SEX'. I reckon this was a coincidence. You have to be VERY observant to even notice it is there. It took me several attempts and I still struggle to find it.
• An original version of The Little Mermaid video had a cover which included a tower of the castle in the form of an erect winky. Now, I believe this was certainly included intentionally. The person drawing it was apparently male so he would definitely know what one looked like, and the detail made it far too convincing that it was intentional! Whether Walt knew is a quandary but I reckon he did. Dirty devil!
• Aladdin is believed to tell Jasmine that 'good girls take off their clothes' when they are about to embark on their magic carpet ride. Filthy boy! Personally, though, I don't think he says that at all. It sounds more like 'hoom bah dolly pop snuff'. Exactly! Gobbledygook!!

There is a wonderful website that includes many more of these 'mistakes' called Snopes. It's not just naughty things either; there are some interesting and fun facts about Disney films that the creators included, such as Belle walking through the Parisian streets in a scene from The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

If there are any other cheeky mistakes that you know about, please share! Also, feel free to give your opinion about whether or not these inclusions were intentional.

- Loulabella posting from her iPhone

Shappi Khorsandi

I saw this comedienne on BBC Three last night for the first time...she is absolutely hilarious.

She's certainly the best comedienne I've seen in a very long time.

Loula's Comedy Rating: ••••
(She lost out on a blob as I wouldn't put her in the same category just yet as John Bishop, Michael McIntyre, Peter Kay or Rhod Gilbert)

- Loulabella posting from her iPhone